Category: Childless Holidays

12 Days of Childlessness and 12 Days of Infertility.

Published / by sandymichelet / Leave a Comment

On the 1st day of Childlessness, my inner voice said to me “This bites, you’ll have no legacy”.

On the 2nd day of Childlessness, my inner voice said to me “What did I do wrong”

On the 3rd day of Childlessness, my inner voice said to me “I have empty arms”

On the 4th day of Childlessness, my inner voice said to me  “I will die alone”

On the 5th day of Childlessness,

my inner voice reminded me 

“FIVE PREGNANT HIGH SCHOOL GIRLSSSSSSSSS”

On the 6th day of Childlessness, my inner voice said to me “People treat me different”

On the 7th day of Childlessness, my inner voice said to me “I’ll never have a baby”

On the 8th day of Childlessness, my inner voice said to me “I’m embarrassed that I’m broken”

On the 9th day of Childlessness, my inner voice said to me “My family is small, its my fault”

On the 10th day of Childlessness, my inner voice said to me “Am I a real woman?”

On the 11th day of Childlessness, my inner voice said to me “Don’t look at me with pity”

On the 12th day of Childlessness, my inner voice said to me “Will I be remembered?”, “Don’t look at me with pity”, “Am I a real woman?”, “My family is small, its my fault” “I’m embarrassed that I’m broken”, “I’ll never have a baby”, “People treat me different”, “FIVE PREGNANT HIGH SCHOOL GIRLSSSSSSSSS”,  “I will die alone”, “I have empty arms”, “What did I do wrong” and “This bites, you’ll have no legacy”.

12 days of Infertility

To me, someone who is infertile has been unable to conceive a child but is still TTC (trying to conceive) and is hopeful that it will happen. 

On the 1st day of Infertility, my family asked of me “Are you pregnant? We want to see a ba-by”

On the 2nd day of Infertility, my coworkers asked of me “Have you seen a doctor?”

On the 3rd day of Infertility, my dry cleaner said to me “Stop trying it will happen”

On the 4th day of Infertility, my neighbor said to me “Adoption is an option”

On the 5th day of Infertility, my doctor said to me

“FIVE CLOMID DAYSSSSSSSSSSSSS”

On the 6th day of Infertility, my pharm tech said to me “You need to try harder”

On the 7th day of Infertility, my lady at the drive through said to me “If its meant to be you’ll have one”

On the 8th day of Infertility, my mailman said to me “Hurry, you’re getting older”

On the 9th day of Infertility, my waitress said to me “Is it you who has the problem?”

On the 10th day of Infertility, my dentist said to me “IVF could fix this”

On the 11th day of Infertility, my nail tech said to me “Why can’t you get pregnant”?

On the 12th day of Infertility, my doctor said to me “This will never happen”, “Why can’t you get pregnant”?, “IVF could fix this”, “Is it you who has the problem?”, “Hurry, you’re getting older”, “If its meant to be you’ll have one”, “You need to try harder”, “FIVE CLOMID DAYSSSSSSSSS”, “Adoption is an option”, “Stop trying it will happen”, “Have you seen a doctor?”, “Are you pregnant? We want to see a ba-by”

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This started to be a tongue in cheek blog post…but as I wrote I started remembering the unsolicited (i.e. unwelcome/unwanted/not helpful) advice I had received over the years. Add that advice to me already beating myself up and it was a constant barrage of negativity….like a partridge jumping out of the pear tree to peck the childless to death.

Others dream of visions of sugar plums dancing in their head. We dream of a child. 

Others think a Silent Night is a good thing. We think its another night without hearing a cooing baby.

All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth. Nope…………………………

We heard him exclaim as he drove out of sight. Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night.

Let it sneax, let it sneax, let it sneaux

Published / by sandymichelet / Leave a Comment
The backyard. Our southern ducks were not happy. “We moved to the south to get out of the cold and now our lake is icy.”

If by some miracle, “a chance of snow” shows up on the local weather report, the city goes into crisis mode because of the impending snowflake. Schools shut down, businesses close and everyone runs to the stores to grocery shop for a hurricane. (That is the only weather related prep we know). 

It snowed here Friday. But what happened next was even more shocking. 

It kept snowing. For hours and hours and hours. The city. Lost. Its. Mind.  

I present to you…the biker snowman

Soon, the obligatory snowmen started to pop up. We can’t be normal around here, so we dress our snowmen like LSU football players, hunters, bikers (oh, wait. that was us.) Everyone scurries to create a picture perfect moment because snowmen (unlike memories), don’t last long. It is usually 90 degrees the following morning so excitement always ends.

“I love ya….but its too cold to take my hands out of my pocket to hug you for the picture”

 

 

But not this time. Snowmen were still popping up yesterday. The snow was still stuck to the ground….. so our winter wonderland continued.

Today, I am enjoying a quiet Sunday morning. The city shows no signs that the Baton Rouge Blizzard of 2017 even occurred. Except….our snowmen haven’t left us. They are PROUDLY STANDING TALL. Everything else has melted, but the snowflakes are (pardon the pun) sticking together. 

Childless women are the same way. We can be fragile…until you get us in a group…and then look out!

If you consider yourself childless, check out these resources. When we stick together, we are much stronger. And PROUDLY STAND TALL.

The Childless Life Private Facebook Group

Baton Rouge Childless Women Monthly Meet Up Coffee & Chat

Gateway-Women Facebook Page

Sidenote:

In Louisiana, anything with an “eaux” ending is pronounced “oh”….so Geaux Tigers is pronounced Go Tigers….and Let it sneax is Let it snow!

 

The 4 P’s of Thanksgiving

Published / by sandymichelet / Leave a Comment

Pilgrims. Pumpkins. Pies. Pturkey. (It’s an alliteration thing…)

Yes. There is more to Thanksgiving than the 4 P’s. But since 1621, it has gone from sharing a bountiful harvest to a bastardized holiday that means a.) a day off from work b.) over eating and c.) arguing with some crazy person at midnight in Wal-mart about a tv. (On a sidenote: I wasn’t that crazy….I did think I was first in line.)

It seems like the term “grateful” has become an uber popular term over the last 20 years or so. We’ve always known what it meant….but Oprah got involved with her gratitude journals and everything took off from there.

I woke up around 6am with 100 thoughts running through my mind. One that kept coming up was how grateful I am for each of you. Thank you for not only supporting me spilling my guts for all to see….but actually encouraging it. You’ve sent messages, comments, etc…and you’ve shared the blog and the Meet Up with those in your life who are in a similar situation. The conversation has started….and you are helping to keep it going.

I thought about writing all day but changed my mind. I am instead counting blessings, planning for the long weekend….and getting ready for some pturkey.

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